A Few Lixxx

by Captain Three Leg

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GK#93 c&p 2011 karaoke/c3l

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released 19 September 2011

GRINDCORE CINEMA presents
a MORTVILLE RECORDS production
"A Few Lixxx"

The soundtrack to being fucked over by the police, relationships gone wrong, the love of music and the joys of the opposite sex. The lyrics determined the style, length and structure of the songs even though the Captain decided to scrap the vocals and leave the songs as instrumentals. Don’t question the process, just enjoy the results.

All Songs written by Captain Three Leg. Recorded on a Fostex XR-7 multitrack the 5th and 6th of September, 2009. Overdubs recorded with Reaper v3.11 November/December, 2009. Mastered with Soundforge 4.5, December 13th, 2009.

Brian - Drums and percussion.
Andy - Guitar, bass guitar, Roland SH-101, Yamaha PSS-470, engineering.

Guest guitar solo on "Liquid Bling" by Travis Atkinson.

Artwork by Food Fortunata and Cole Hiatt.

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Track Name: Brain Tumor
BRAIN TUMOR
She got a cancer like a bomb
Wedged tight in her brain
She starves it with hate and tears
She never, never shows no fear
That goddamn snake tightens every day
Runaway train and there ain’t no brakes
Ain’t no way to shut it down
White hot lava burnin’ all around
Her brain… her brain… her brain…
Cancer girl, too bad to live
Cancer girl, too good to die
Crazy eyes, you just don’t get it
Don’t get close, you will regret it
She see’s things that ain’t there
I can see ‘em too
They crawl around in front of our eyes
All we smell is doom
Rats and filth all around
There is no light to be found
Wonder if we’re already dead
Think I’ll reach up and close the lid
Cancer girl, I love you so
Way fucked up, no place to go
Can’t be loved, but I still do
I’m hangin’ around, but I ain’t no fool
One a these days…
One a these days…
We’re gonna lose your mind
We’re gonna lose your mind
That cancer feeds her white hot fire
That cancer tells her what to do
Cancer says she can’t run and hide
There ain’t no hope in hell for you
That cancer don’t tell no lies
That cancer ain’t shittin’ me
That cancer will gun her down
Machine gun madness through and through
Run and run can’t get nowhere
The same black hole runnin’ through my head
I feel her soul pourin’ out of me
I scream and scream, all ears are dead
Cancer girl, I love you so
Way fucked up, no place to go
Can’t be loved, but I still do
I’m hangin’ around, but I ain’t no fool
One a these days…
One a these days…
We’re gonna lose your mind
We’re gonna lose your mind
Don’t know how long she’s got
Fuck it, it don’t matter at all
Long as she’s here we’re gonna raise hell
Long as she’s here, she’s gonna have a ball… maybe two
Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide
She’s gonna stick right by my side
Keep on slammin’ long as we can
She’s a cancer girl and I’m her man
Cancer girl, I love you so
Way fucked up, no place to go
Can’t be loved, but I still do
I’m hangin’ around, but I ain’t no fool
One a these days…
One a these days…
We’re gonna lose your mind
We’re gonna lose your mind
Track Name: Jukebox Boy
JUKEBOX BOY
I reach in my pocket for some change
Drop a quarter in the slot and hear it ring
Flip through the titles for a name
I just can’t find a god damn thing
Kick the machine to get back my change
Fucker won’t give up a god damn thing
Kick it again and again and again
Ain’t no way I’m gonna get my change
A lady calls the cops on me
They get there fast, get the drop on me
I run out the door with a slam
Bullets flyin’ past my head
The sirens they are callin’ me
25 blocks to the next machine
I’m a juke box boy, that’s no lie
A juke box boy willin’ to die
A juke box boy with a habit so huge
A juke box boy through and through
Gotta have it every day
Gotta have it any ol’ way
Gotta have it when I get my pay
A juke box song to set me free
Runnin’, runnin’, runnin’ like hell
Cops on my ass want me in a cell
No music in my head to soothe my brain
Need the next machine ‘fore I go insane
I dodge in an alley, cut to the left
Runnin’, runnin’, nearly outta breath
The cops, the cops are closin’ fast
There ain’t no way they gonna get my ass
Tryin’ to lose cops donut fat
Divin’ in a sewer with plenty of rats
Cops keep cruising past my hole
Smell of the place ‘bout to melt my soul
Got the whole world comin’ down on me
I need a juke box song to set me free
I’m a juke box boy, that’s no lie
A juke box boy willin’ to die
A juke box boy with a habit so huge
A juke box boy through and through
Gotta have it every day
Gotta have it any ol’ way
Gotta have it when I get my pay
A juke box song to set me free
Just so close, but so far away
Plenty a pigs ‘tween a juke box and me
I gotta chance it, I just can’t wait
bullets ricochetin’ off the sewer grate
I make my best rabbit move
Runnin’ ‘tween bullets, I just can’t lose
Slidin’ along fast and smooth
Just gotta have that juke box groove
All of a sudden it all goes black
Bastards put a bullet in my back
I don’t care, I’ve gone way wrong
Gotta have one last juke box song
Mumbo jumbo over my grave
Just can’t wait, throw the dirt on me
Fallin’, fallin’, straight to hell
Send me down that hot, black well
I’m a juke box boy, that’s no lie
A juke box boy willin’ to die
A juke box boy with a habit so huge
A juke box boy through and through
Gotta have it every day
Gotta have it any ol’ way
Gotta have it when I get my pay
A juke box song to set me free
I bet the Devil is waitin’ for me
Gonna drop a quarter in his music machine
The Devil’s music will set me free
A poor ol’ juke box boy like me
Track Name: Art Appreciation
ART APPRECIATION
Gotta big lizard in a denim cage
He’s about a foot long
Let him out as much as I can
Let him run, let him have his head
He gets real hungry late at night
I feed him in a cave
Dark and wet, he loves it in there
Satisfies his rage
Gotta beautiful woman, never in the kitchen
Her talents lie elsewhere
Only one thing to make her pleased
Let her feed my lizard while she gives him a squeeze
She’s a rodeo rider, likes a big buckin’ horse
Best there is, nobody comes close
Rides him bareback, never with clothes
Hangs on tight, grips his belly with her toes
She’s a musician, loves playing the flute
Shrieks and moans an amazing tune
Makes loud music all night long
Movin’ the earth is her favorite song
She’s a talented girl, she can do anything
Loves lizards, horses and flutes
I just love to watch her go
She’s amazing at her work
Makin’ her art all night long
Never tires of playin’ passionate songs
Ridin’ her horse, squeezin’ my lizard
Playing her flute, she’s a creative wizard
Multi-talented, she likes to paint
I’m a blank canvas, she can’t wait
Uses her tongue instead of a brush
Talented girl, give a clay man a rush
She can paint with her fingers
Make me tingle, make me shiver
Way abstract with her nose
she’s real surreal with her toes
I’m an art connoisseur of a special kind
I appreciate the way she bends my mind
She’s got imagination, natural creation
Girly Van Gogh, reincarnation
Temperamental, unpredictable
She’s got an original touch
Makes me feel, makes my mind reel
Spins me around like a potter’s wheel
Squeeze my lizard, ride that horse
Play that flute, spin me like a pot
Put me in your kiln, fire your man
I’ll push my wood into your red-hot can
Another artist who will starve
But she don’t care, she hits the mark
You’ll never be famous around the world
But you’re an artist, baby, you’re a talented girl
She’s a rodeo rider, likes a big buckin’ horse
Best there is, nobody comes close
Rides him bareback, never with clothes
Hangs on tight, grips his belly with her toes
She’s a musician, loves playing the flute
Shrieks and moans an amazing tune
Makes loud music all night long
Movin’ the earth is her favorite song
She’s a talented girl, she can do anything
Loves lizards, horses and flutes
I just love to watch her go
She’s amazing at her work
Makin’ her art all night long
Never tires of playin’ passionate songs
Ridin’ her horse, squeezin’ my lizard
Playing her flute, she’s a creative wizard
Track Name: True Love
TRUE LOVE
They say true love will set you free
It’s magic every day
I believe in true love
In a little different way
A cut, a scratch, each a black eye
The woman ‘n me, another fight
Whips ‘n chains, lasted all night
Furniture busted, ain’t no lights
Lusty madness, stops for a while
She lied again, won’t happen no more
Smiled at her, I said sure
I bit her ear, she started to purr
Jumped on me from behind
Lightnin’ flashin’ from hard blue eyes
Threw me down on the floor
Bloodied me with claws, screamed for more
She’s my beastie girl – a vicious animal whore
She’s my beastie girl – I’m comin’ back for more
She’s my beastie girl – she’s handy with her claws
She’s my beastie girl – she’s everything I want
Atom bomb temper, born in hell
Might kill somebody, never can tell
Got devil magic runnin’ in her veins
When she explodes, she’s gotta get laid
When she wants it, I’m on the run
She’s a real bad shot, but he’s got a gun
Blinded by lust, always misses me
Knows damn well it makes me mean
Nympho eyes, tells wicked lies
I slap her hard, she just smiles
Crazy woman, knows me well
Makes me horny when I’m mad as hell
She’s my beastie girl – a vicious animal whore
She’s my beastie girl – I’m comin’ back for more
She’s my beastie girl – she’s handy with her claws
She’s my beastie girl – she’s everything I want
A real animal, she’s wild game
Make a lion run the other way
Sandpaper touch with legs so long
Breakin’ glass voice, a beautiful song
Too much makeup, blood lipstick
Skull ring fingers, rouge real thick
Scars here ‘n there, winner’s razor cuts
Scorpion tattoos on her butt
Lean and mean, rocky mountain chest
Viciously sexy, different from the rest
Chainsaw mouth, she’s a grim reaper
One of a kind, I’ll never leave her
She’s my beastie girl – a vicious animal whore
She’s my beastie girl – I’m comin’ back for more
She’s my beastie girl – she’s handy with her claws
She’s my beastie girl – she’s everything I want
Gets out a rope, gonna tie me up tight
Cracks a whip across my thighs
She’s way twisted, likes it real rough
Wants to be smacked as I put her in cuffs
She ain’t human when she wants laid
Animal side makes her insane
An angry beast, a hunger for lust
Make up sex, there’s never enough
Can’t stay apart for too long
We howl in tune, the same hot song
Love each other, it’s so right
Smokin’ hot animals after a fight
She’s my beastie girl – a vicious animal whore
She’s my beastie girl – I’m comin’ back for more
She’s my beastie girl – she’s handy with her claws
She’s my beastie girl – she’s everything I want
Track Name: Unhappy Clowns
UNHAPPY CLOWNS
Alarm bangs out dream destroyin’ tones
Gotta get up, tired to the bone
Know what’s comin’, wanna stay in bed
Gotta go slave with a mind full of dread
Put on my pants one leg at a time
Ain’t no faster way
Crisp, clean shirt, each arm in a sleeve
Can’t go faster, movin’ like molasses
Tie my shoes with a mighty fine shine
Look at the mess in the mirror
No time to shave, no time to brush
Runnin’ way late in too slow a rush
Out the door, a real slow rocket
Grab my keys outta my pocket
Fire up my ride, hear the engine whine
Pop it in gear, hear the tranny grind
Tires smokin’, I give it the gas
Cop stops me, wants me kissin’ his ass
I done the dirty deed, no doubt about it
Want my dignity, but the man won’t allow it
Cop keeps me there quite a while
Screams at me, spittin’ out bile
“You shamed your whole family and the human race.”
He’s spittin’ on me as he works up his rage
“What’s wrong with you boy, where’s the fire?
You’re a criminal, need burned with a hot iron.
Got no respect for authority.
Get outta here, ‘fore I nail ya to a tree.”
“You will fear my authority.
If you don’t, I’ll smack ya to yer knees.
You takin’ the rap just ain’t enough.
Abusin’ authority make’s me tough.”
Give it up you unhappy clown
Let me alone, stop bringin’ me down
All I want is my dignity
Bein’ the man… don’t give you the right… to take it from me
Held up by the cop, no place to park
Gotta see the boss, get a big black mark
I get inside, coffee and a smile
Secretary says boss waitin’ a while
It’s a trap, no way to escape
An unhappy clown is lyin’ in wait
Brace myself for a big ordeal
Dumb as a post, sees himself a big wheel
Boss sittin’, smilin’ at my pain
I excuse myself, try to explain
He ain’t buyin’ it, tells me I’m lame
Eyes drillin’ me, this ain’t no game
“Know why yer here? Yer late for the bell.”
Big wheel’s boilin’, gonna send me to hell
“Gonna cut your pay, you’re my slave.
You’re gonna be late for your own grave.
Better fear me, and that ain’t all.
Better kiss ass or I’ll have your balls”
“You will fear my authority.
If you don’t, I’ll smack ya to yer knees.
You takin’ the rap just ain’t enough.
Abusin’ authority make’s me tough.”
Give it up you unhappy clown
Let me alone, stop bringin’ me down
All I want is my dignity
Bein’ the man… don’t give you the right… to take it from me
“Gonna nail ya on a cross ‘cause I’m the man.
Gonna crush your mind just ‘cause I can.
Got no soul, got a mean, mean smile.
Kiss my ass and do it with style”
“I’m authority… and you better fear me.”
No sex, no drugs, no rock ‘n’ roll
Way too busy puttin’ people in a hole
Real unhappy ‘till they smash good things
No satisfaction ‘till they make a man scream
“I’m authority and you better fear me”
Too tight asses, too tight face
Right on the edge of the human race
Hear good jokes with a poker face
Knuckle draggin’ bastards, always in a rage
“I’m authority… and you better fear me.”
Always laugh at the pain of others
Got no love even for their own mothers
Turned down mouth, muscular frown
Get in their sights, they’ll gun you down
They get a scratch, it’s the end of the world
I lose a leg, it’s no big deal
Biggest whiners when they get caught
Blame everybody for their own damn faults
“I’m authority… and you better fear me.”
What is wrong with these unhappy clowns?
Get their rocks off grindin’ me down
Humiliation is all they know
Authority makes their self-hate grow
“I’m authority… and you better fear me.”
Feel so small ‘till they beat me down
Get ten feet tall crushin’ happy clowns
Gotta melt my soul everyday
Unhappy clowns can’t see another way
Keep it up, go right ahead
One a these days yer gonna be dead
Had one chance, ya shoulda done right
You won’t care ‘till the hell fire lights
Satan’s a waitin’, clappin’ hooves with glee
Unhappy clowns will get a real treat
A dose of medicine all their own
Hear them whine, flesh burnin’ off bone
“You will fear my authority.
If you don’t, I’ll smack ya to yer knees.
You takin’ the rap just ain’t enough.
Abusin’ authority make’s me tough.”
Give it up you unhappy clown
Let me alone, stop bringin’ me down
All I want is my dignity
Bein’ the man… don’t give you the right… to take it from me